Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
