Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize
