Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
