apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Randomize
