he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize