Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Randomize
