Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize