Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
i just made my gag reflex go away.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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