they need to just BURY HIM!
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
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