a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
So squirting runs in the family.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
Randomize
