you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Randomize
