I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
