im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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