If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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