Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Randomize
