do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
We're too hungover to prance.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize