living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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