Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
