just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
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