It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
