what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
