Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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