Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
And then the night went full on bisexual.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize
