we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Randomize
