Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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