I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
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