I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
that is very illegal...i love you.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
