We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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