16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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