Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
