My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
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