fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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