If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
