how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I just want to make out with him forever
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
