we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
