New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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