So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
