I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Bring me that man meat
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
