There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
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