I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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