im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI
this is why i love drunk you
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
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