Im at strip club and am horny
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
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