Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
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