she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Randomize
