so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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