is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Randomize