You work out of a Hotel?
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Randomize
