This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
