it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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