): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
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