It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Randomize